Tags
Accident, car, car accident, emotional attachment, Emotions, feelins, Heartbreak, possessiveness, Scratches, Trauma
I saw a gleaming Porsche in my colony yesterday. I eyed the beauty with a single thought, ‘How does it’s owner manage to sleep peacefully? Every night this dream is parked outside unguarded; must be possessive agony till he/she sees it safe and sound next morning.’
I found out the next day…Today. The Porsche was fine. My car had been banged into by an unknown reckless driver.
I received the gloomy details courtesy my maid. Time: 9.30 am. Damage: Emblem ripped off, Bumper hanging out. Witness: None. (Yes, on a crowded, buzzing with life, weekday morning. I can totally see why Nobody Killed Jessica can happen in our country). Assailant: Absconding.
I heard in silence. My heart held anything but silence.
2 voices babbled within me. The Intellectual one; saying ‘Don’t react. It is a mere material object; not worthy of emotional attachment. The mind always blows out of proportion a minor problem. Intellectualize the problem.’
The Emotional voice sobbed, “It is not a mere material object. She is My car. My baby!’
Intellectual said, ‘Possession is a Momentary Joy; and Permanent Agony at the thought of losing it.’ When I brought her home 2 years, the dread started: regarding the First Scratch.
My Liva is an electric blue. The tiniest scratch would stand out like a jagged scar. Why hadn’t I listened to my brother’s sensible suggestion of White or Silver? He then offered me another sensible suggestion, “Make the first scratch yourself. It will hurt less.’ I had shuddered at the mere hint.
Back to today. As I rode down the elevator, I steeled myself for the inevitable. Practical one reminded me gently to carry the home key(or you are stuck outdoors), turn off the geyser (nobody wants two accidents to crash into their lives). Intellectual one prodded me- ‘Visualize the damage and make it as worse as you can. Reality will seem much bearable in comparison. ‘
Emotional one screwed shut its eyes before they saw. Practical one glanced to see if the car was jutting out; badly parked? It wasn’t. I was not guilty. Then why? Out of all the cars parked in a row…unaffected. Why my car? Why Mine?
Intellectual one reasoned , ‘It could have been worse.
1.You could have been inside when the other car banged into it.
2.You could have been the cause of your car accident.’
Maybe. It could have been worse. Perhaps the blow we receive is a pre-softened version of the one meant for us.
Emotional one stooped over the car, with trembling lips. ‘No, it was not mere metal and paint. She was my darling. Hurt, bruised, ripped. I wanted to scoop her up in my arms and carry her home. She was my private Oasis from the humanity overflowing outside it, my Chariot. Mine.’
Wynand says in Fountainhead, ‘Whenever anything becomes Mine; it acquires a special quality, a halo around it.’ I identified completely with him.
The Practical one assessed the damage in cool detachment. It checked the Insurance date. Checked the PUC. Mechanically reached for the service station and dialed an appointment.
Tomorrow, the mechanic, the truly emotionally-detached will decide whether my Baby gets hospitalized or waltzes home with a mere band-aid.
So, is ‘Emotional detachment’ a farce?
If a Philosophy is not practicable, can it still exist?
What does your car mean to you- Possession, Object or Beloved?
Damyanti said:
Well, attachment is part of what makes us human. I love the way you’ve portrayed the conflict within you– and though I don’t drive and don’t own a car, I identify with it. I do feel a tad upset when one of my books, laptops, jewelry get defaced.
The least whoever scratched your car can do is apologize and offer to pay for damages 🙂
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dr sweetyshinde said:
Thank you. I am glad I got my emotions across.
Apologize and pay? In India? Not even dreaming of it. All I hope is they at least feel a tad bit guilty and their conscience gnaws at them.
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swamiyesudas said:
Good one, Sweety! You start with Cars, and end up having Us answer questions! Naughty, Naughty!
Had a Jeep and mobikes years ago. But they were Workhorses.
Have Treasured some small things, like Some Flowers given me by some Children, and other small gifted artefacts.
‘Emotional detachment’ a not a farce. It is possible, and I have practised it, and still do.
If a Philosophy is not practicable, it can still exist, IN PAPER!
Love and Regards. 🙂
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dr sweetyshinde said:
Well, I’m still attempting emotional detachment – and not really succeeding. I weave a story around my owned items, I pin an inviolable halo around them, I perform a namekeeping ceremony for them – and then they get into my blood.
I still haven’t sold off my old car after purchasing the new one. Too many memories associated with the older car – plus, she still moves smoothly.
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swamiyesudas said:
Very Good, Sweety! First of all, do not give up things that are in Good condition yet. As for keeping things…
Just today, when I was searching for something, came across a little Plastic Bangle which some Dear Child must have given me. The problem is, I have even forgotten who gave it to me!!! 🙂
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dr sweetyshinde said:
Aww, so sweet of the child. God’s little angels!
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mukul said:
woman, don’t overlook the watch cat
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dr sweetyshinde said:
hmm, she is not mine unfortunately. She lords over our hospital parking lot. Her attitude is ‘Today I give you the honor of perching myself atop ur vehicle.’
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